The Lost Art of Connecting by Susan McPherson cover

The Lost Art of Connecting

The Gather, Ask, Do Method for Building Meaningful Business Relationships

by Susan McPherson

4.6(181 ratings)
9 min read

Brief overview

This book offers a refreshing method for creating productive, long-lasting business relationships by focusing on genuine connection. It emphasizes the importance of identifying what you can offer, staying curious about others, and nurturing ties over time. By centering on service and empathy instead of competition, it reveals how trust and meaningful collaborations can flourish in any work environment.

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Introduction

We live in a world that often feels like one long stream of emails, video calls, and social media updates. Yet, many of us still crave genuine human connection. This book starts by tackling a big question: how can we ensure our professional relationships are not reduced to shallow transactions but become spaces of trust and mutual enrichment?

In these pages, you'll discover an approach that centers on understanding your own motivations, determining how you can serve others, and steadily building relationships based on shared goals. No matter your industry or expertise, you can learn to create partnerships that last well beyond a single handshake or passing referral.

In place of the usual "What's in it for me?" style of networking, you'll hear insights on how to show up authentically. You will see that the art of connecting happens when we shift our focus from simply gathering contacts to intentionally forging deeper bonds—bonds that lead to collaboration, insight, and personal growth.

When you begin by asking, “How can I help?” you spark trust and curiosity—two key elements of any meaningful connection.

Shifting the Networking Mindset

For many years, "networking" has suggested awkward small talk at company mixers. But a crucial reframe is learning to approach these interactions more like friendships than mere business transactions. By showing a genuine desire to learn from and help others, you cultivate a sense of collaboration rather than competition.

The first step is to examine why you want to form certain connections. Clarifying your purpose not only helps you share it with others, it grounds your efforts in honesty. Maybe it's to support a cause, find new mentors, or build a team for a project. With your goals clear, you are better prepared for each conversation.

This mindset shift also involves embracing a broader view of networking as a tool for discovery and growth. Instead of tallying up contacts, ask what you can offer each person you meet—be it a new resource, an encouraging introduction, or a fresh perspective.

Collaboration is fueled by curiosity. Genuine intrigue in someone’s challenges or successes opens doors that mere self-interest cannot.

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What is The Lost Art of Connecting about?

"The Lost Art of Connecting: The Gather, Ask, Do Method for Building Meaningful Business Relationships" by Susan McPherson is a guide for navigating the complex world of professional networking with genuine human connection and empathy. The book introduces a compelling approach—'Gather, Ask, Do'—to foster meaningful and lasting relationships in the business world. It emphasizes the power of serving and understanding others, shifting the focus from competition to collaboration.

McPherson highlights practical strategies for redefining networking away from transactional exchanges and toward meaningful interactions. By grounding her method in the essence of empathy and genuine curiosity, she suggests how readers can nurture existing connections, harness opportunities for mutual growth, and maintain them through small, intentional actions. These insights reveal the transformative potential of a purpose-driven approach to networking.

This book moves beyond traditional advice by illustrating how trust and collaboration can thrive in any professional environment. It offers a refreshing perspective on the nuances of interpersonal relationships, emphasizing their lifelong impact. McPherson's method serves as a roadmap for those who wish to cultivate enriching partnerships that resonate beyond mere acquaintanceship.

Review of The Lost Art of Connecting

Susan McPherson's "The Lost Art of Connecting" delivers a fresh perspective on networking, offering readers a method to forge meaningful connections rather than transient acquaintances. The book's 'Gather, Ask, Do' framework serves as its core strength, framing network building as a purposeful and empathetic undertaking. Potentially overwhelming networking scenarios are broken down into actionable steps, making the practice approachable and effective.

The author's style is engaging and accessible, weaving together expert insights and relatable anecdotes. McPherson succeeds in illustrating how to balance professional goals with genuine interpersonal relationships. She skillfully marries practical advice with a clear methodology, making the book relevant to professionals across various domains.

Particularly striking is the emphasis on self-awareness and empathy in communication, which reflects a departure from the conventional 'what's in it for me?' mindset. With real-world applications focused on collaboration and relationship depth, this book is a treasure for anyone aiming to enhance their professional network. I recommend it to readers seeking to build relationships marked by trust and shared purpose, rather than fleeting engagements.

Who should read The Lost Art of Connecting?

  • Business professionals who wish to improve their networking skills and build long-lasting industry connections.
  • Individuals in leadership roles looking to foster teamwork and community within their organizations.
  • Introverts who find traditional networking events intimidating but want to expand their professional circles.
  • Young professionals navigating the early stages of their careers seeking mentorship and guidance.
  • HR managers and team leaders aiming to cultivate a culture of empathy and collaboration in the workplace.

About the author

Susan McPherson is a serial connector, angel investor, and corporate responsibility expert with over 30 years of experience in marketing, public relations, and sustainability communications. She is the founder and CEO of McPherson Strategies, a communications consultancy focused on the intersection of brands and social impact. Susan has written "The Lost Art of Connecting: The Gather, Ask, Do Method for Building Meaningful Business Relationships" and has contributed to the Harvard Business Review, Fast Company, and Forbes. She has received numerous accolades, including Forbes magazine’s 50 over 50—Impact 2021 award and Worth Media’s Worthy100 award.

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