The Explosive Child by Ross W. Greene cover

The Explosive Child

A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children

by Ross W. Greene

4.7(7,024 ratings)
9 min read

Brief overview

This book offers a fresh perspective on why some children exhibit rapidly escalating outbursts. It promotes empathy by showing that kids lack certain skills rather than motivation. Through practical strategies and collaboration, parents can work to solve the issues fueling these problematic behaviors.

Download on the App StoreGet it on Google Play

Introduction

Have you ever felt at a loss when your child seems to explode with frustration for reasons that seem impossible to predict? This section lays out the essential idea that children are not simply defiant or provocative out of choice. They act out because they struggle with certain developmental skills such as flexibility, frustration tolerance, and problem-solving. These skills are as important as reading or math, yet they're often overlooked or assumed to be natural.

Instead of labeling a child as disobedient, this approach begins with asking: “Why is the child exploding in the first place?” Once you step away from blame, real progress can happen. Drop the usual assumptions, think of skill deficits, and discover a new path to address challenging moments with compassion.

Children do well if they can, not if they want to.

Why Challenges Occur

The core message is that your child’s problematic outbursts stem from delayed skills. These can vary from difficulty handling transitions to trouble expressing needs verbally. When these areas are underdeveloped, everyday pressures become triggers for meltdowns.

Picture a bridge with missing planks. Your child wants to cross it, but the gaps (lagging skills) jeopardize success. By recognizing the gaps, you can help rebuild the bridge rather than punishing the crossing attempts. In doing so, you also create a cooperation-based mindset that fosters safety and trust.

"Behaviorally challenging kids are challenging because they’re lacking the skills to not be challenging."

Forming this new perspective can reduce guilt and frustration for both the parent and child. It reminds you that your child’s difficulties aren’t personal attacks or manipulative tactics but reflect genuine barriers that need support.

Looking to dive deeper into The Explosive Child?

Download our app to unlock every key idea and gain full access.

Download on the App StoreGet it on Google Play

What is The Explosive Child about?

The Explosive Child by Ross W. Greene provides a skill-based perspective to help parents and caregivers understand why some children become easily frustrated and chronically inflexible. Instead of focusing on defiance or lack of motivation, the book positions the root cause in lagging cognitive and emotional skills. With empathy at its core, this approach reframes family struggles into solvable problems, guiding readers to proactively address the factors behind explosive outbursts.

Throughout its pages, this book introduces a collaborative method for identifying and resolving the child’s unsolved problems. The author moves beyond simple discipline tactics by showing how skill development can create positive change. Readers discover practical tools to build calmer routines, open communication, and deeper connections with their children while respecting each individual’s viewpoint.

Review of The Explosive Child

One of this book’s standout strengths is its practical focus on lagging skills and problem-solving. Instead of relying on punishment or rewards, The Explosive Child encourages parents to engage in thoughtful collaboration, ensuring a child’s concerns are heard and addressed. This makes the content accessible because it teaches concrete steps for preventing meltdowns, rather than responding to them mid-crisis.

Its emphasis on empathy and respect applies across different family settings, offering solutions that resonate with both parents and professionals. Written in a friendly, professional style, the book’s tone helps readers absorb key ideas without feeling overwhelmed. Even if you have tried many parenting methods, you may find renewed hope in these pages. For a supportive, skill-based strategy that cultivates a more peaceful home environment, The Explosive Child comes highly recommended.

Who should read The Explosive Child?

  • Parents of children who often experience sudden or intense emotional outbursts
  • Educators or school counselors seeking ways to address challenging classroom behaviors
  • Caregivers interested in empathy-focused strategies for guiding children’s development
  • Mental health professionals looking to incorporate skill-based problem-solving into therapy sessions
  • Grandparents or extended family members who offer regular support and want a deeper understanding of challenging behavior

About the author

Ross W. Greene, PhD, is a clinical child psychologist and the originator of the evidence-based Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) model. He received his PhD in clinical psychology from Virginia Tech in 1989 and has held academic appointments at Harvard Medical School for over 20 years, as well as at Virginia Tech and the University of Technology Sydney. Greene has authored several influential books, including "The Explosive Child," which focuses on helping children with behavioral challenges by identifying and addressing lagging skills and unsolved problems. He is the founding director of the non-profit Lives in the Balance and has worked extensively with families, schools, and therapeutic facilities to implement the CPS model.

Want to see all key ideas from The Explosive Child?

Download our app to access the complete summary

Download on the App StoreGet it on Google Play

Book summaries like The Explosive Child

Why readers love Mindleap

10-Minute Book Insights

Get the core ideas from the world's best books in just 10 minutes of reading or listening.

Curated For You

Discover your next favorite book with personalized recommendations based on your interests.

AI Book ExpertNew

Chat with our AI to help find the best book for you and your goals.

Reviews of MindLeap

Love how I can get the key ideas from books in just 15 minutes! Perfect for my busy schedule and helps me decide which books to read in full.

Alex R.

The summaries are incredibly well-written and the audio feature is perfect for my commute. Such a time-saver!

Jessica M.

Great app for personal growth. The insights are clear and actionable, and I love how they capture the essence of each book.

Chris P.

The app is beautifully designed and the summaries are top-notch. Definitely worth every penny!

Sarah K.

Ready to dive deeper into The Explosive Child?

Get instant access to key insights from this book and thousands more

Download on the App StoreGet it on Google Play