It's Not Supposed to Be This Way

Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered

by Lysa TerKeurst

4.8(19,890 ratings)

8 min read

Brief overview

This book is about discovering how to navigate heartbreak and disappointment with renewed faith and resilience. It explores why painful seasons can become opportunities for personal growth and a closer relationship with God. By reading it, you will learn to find hope even when life feels shattered and gain practical truths to move forward with strength.

Introduction

Life often feels like it should be better and easier than it is, but then crisis strikes unexpectedly. Disappointment arrives in everything from small misunderstandings to major heartbreaks we couldn’t see coming.

In these moments, it’s tempting to question God’s goodness or doubt if He is present at all. Yet this book invites you to see that when you surrender your pain, you grow and discover a deeper sense of trust.

We begin with an honest look at the raw emotions of heartbreak, acknowledging that all of us, at times, feel life isn’t supposed to be this way. Let’s take the first brave step together, learning stamina for our souls and clarity for our minds.

When Life Suddenly Shatters

A devastating phone call or a single piece of news can alter our world. In an instant, what felt safe becomes uncertain, and disappointment pulls us into fear. The heartbreak might be new or long-standing, but the pain is equally real.

We often reach for quick fixes—trying to ignore our pain, manipulate the situation, or deny anything is wrong. Yet healing rarely follows shortcuts. Instead, heartbreak can push us to stare at areas of our lives that desperately need honest reflection.

Acknowledging we’re overwhelmed can be the first step toward hope. Pain demands our attention so it can lead us to care for the deeper wounds we would otherwise leave hidden. In that awareness, we begin to see the path forward.

Sometimes heartbreak is the prompt that finally forces us to pursue the healing we’ve postponed.

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What is It's Not Supposed to Be This Way about?

“It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered” examines why heartbreak doesn’t have to lead to defeat. Lysa TerKeurst offers an honest discussion of shattered expectations, showing how moments of crisis can spark renewed hope and deeper trust in God. By addressing spiritual truths and personal reflections, the book offers a steady foundation for learning how to stand strong when life takes unexpected turns.

Readers can expect practical insights on facing pain head-on, rather than sidestepping it. With a focus on real-life examples and biblical understanding, this book explains that hope can rise from brokenness, prompting a shift from overwhelmed thinking to faith-filled perspective. Through approachable language and thoughtful guidance, it reveals that every setback holds a seed of possibility if you’re willing to see beyond the immediate hurt.

Review of It's Not Supposed to Be This Way

In “It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way,” Lysa TerKeurst brings a compassionate voice to the topic of disappointment and faith, encouraging readers to move forward rather than remain stuck in despair. Its main strength lies in approachable explanations and relatable examples, which help unveil how heartbreak can uncover deeper purpose and resilience. Instead of short-term fixes, the book suggests enduring strategies like prayer, reflection, and honest self-examination.

Another highlight is the focus on accessible, personal stories that resonate with a wide audience. TerKeurst’s tone balances emotional depth with practical takeaways, making the text easy to follow regardless of one’s spiritual background. Her emphasis on viewing challenges as catalysts for genuine growth sets this work apart from traditional self-help approaches.

This book is suited for anyone who desires renewed perspective and meaningful hope amid life’s hardest moments. It gently guides you to see possibility in the dust of your disappointments. If you’re ready to trust that heartbreak can produce a stronger, more empathetic heart, “It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way” offers a grounded, inviting path forward.

Who should read It's Not Supposed to Be This Way?

Individuals recovering from broken relationships who need faith-based support for moving forward.
Readers wrestling with spiritual doubts who want to discover a deeper purpose in their struggles.
Professionals juggling stress or setbacks, looking for practical reflect-and-pray techniques to build resilience.
Anyone seeking personal growth through adversity, interested in a framework for understanding life’s painful seasons.

About the author

Lysa TerKeurst is the president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and a #1 New York Times bestselling author. She has written 18 books, including "It's Not Supposed to Be This Way," which explores finding unexpected strength in the midst of life's disappointments. With over six million copies of her books sold, TerKeurst is a leading voice in the Christian community, known for her intimate, authentic, and engaging writing style. She has also been awarded the Champions of Faith Author Award and has appeared on the Today Show multiple times.